Lily's fatal love

Lily checked in the bunk bed above me. It was before Christmas.  

Every morning, driving in a lush green countryside to my work, back in England, I dreamt of being in a sunny Australia- Melbourne, to be specific. I have been here before and I loved it. So, there was a bit of certainty that I would love it amongst the waves of uncertainty my direction of life was heading towards. 

“You must have really loved it to come back here, again.” - said John. John was to be my gym buddy during my last few days of stay in Melbourne. Yes, I really did love Melbourne, even though it was my first understanding of how the world is not carefully curated inside of your comfort zone and getting out of the comfort zone is not a pretty sight in any given situation. So many times, this city straight down punched me on my gut, slapped me right on my beliefs, and drowned me onto my fears. I walked drenched- soaked in thoughts of leaving the city- only to find a next laundrette, where I could dry an ounce of my fear so I could muster up the courage to stay. This is how much I loved this city. When I travel somewhere I do not do much research beforehand and probably this is why I fall in love with most of the places I visit, except for Paris. You cannot avoid the palatial portrayal of Paris (and Europe) in most of the movies as this archetype of romance, as if each building and bridge is whispering you an affair of the heart. My personal favorite is a poem called 'Paris in the Rain'. So, I imagined Paris to be all the syllables of love. I don't know much about love but I was hoping that the pavement of Paris will speak all the similes and metaphor of romance, instead, I found a lift so small and slow, only my sister and my disbelief could fit in, and by the time we got dragged up on the fourth floor, our brother would have already opened the keys to his room. I actually nearly tripped on the pavement or my expectation and got lost in crowded daylight. I have learned that romanticizing the city, country, or person is not a good idea. I am still not sure if it was my fault or the city’s. Therefore, with experience, I conclude (for me) it is best not to research and just mentally prepare yourself for any surprises, the city may bear later. My point is not researching might be the reason why I fell in love with the most liveable city (which I found out later from my roommate)- Melbourne, in the first place. 

I woke up from taking a little nap. Lily was sitting on the floor and facing me, her eyes cooped up on her mobile screen. She was charging her phone. I felt like I had to start a conversation, more in an obligatory way. Her phone screen was the only thing avoiding the awkwardness of the small talk we would have had. It looked as if she was in search of something on her life on the screen. Later I came to find out, she was just here for a night. If you are here for a night, you don't really care about your roommates because you will leave the next day, so clearly she didn't really care if we spoke or not. Anyhow, I started with hello. Next thing I know, she will be flying to Japan to see this guy who has other European girlfriends (they know about each other) in several different apartments in Tokyo and she deliriously announced she will spend her last two weeks of her six months travel journey in one of the apartments. Did I mention that Lily was from Germany? I guess she was proud to be one of the European girlfriends of this average-looking (she showed me the picture) Japanese guy. Before she mentioned the guy, she was fervently expressing how much she loved Tokyo. Probably why there was a little bit of disappointment nod from her when I told her I was from Nepal, as my exterior could easily pass for Japanese (as there are only two countries in Asia- China and Japan) whereas my interior is filled with American Hip-hop, Bollywood films and constant consumption of insecurities fed with its quick-fix solutions. For me, all of her fondness over Tokyo just drowned with the background music from the rooftop party, the hostel organized Friday, Sunday, and every other day, when she mentioned this mysterious man. I say mysterious because that's what Lily would have described him as. For me, I would describe someone like him as a psychopath? and Lily, a Neurotic? Yes, I make strong judgments. I come from a knotted ethnic background of a third world country where we are proud of having calendars of traditions accustomed to numbers of dubious beliefs. Either way, in the name of preserving my heritage, a slight opinion from my side is natural!

It was evident though, she was giddy in love or infatuation. I guess there is no distinction between the two in today's world. I say today's world because I have only heard about romantic heroes in history. Lily was giddy in love as her eyes sparkled when she talked about her mister. Her body looked tired; her eyes- full of excitement as she was flying to Japan soon. If I hadn't said hello and pretended to be asleep (I do that a lot in a hostel), I would have never known about this weird-like polygamy-type 'situationship'. So, I thanked this city, once again, for engaging me in this brief encounter of absurdity so I could stretch my bubble a bit more. Lily went to the rooftop party as I went to sleep, a little bit disturbed not because of the music, but because of the varied opinions and thoughts dancing around the room, and the lingering giddiness of Lily's fatal love.

The next morning, I woke up at 10 am and Lily was long gone.